Lest you think that hillbilly tendencies only exist in the 'burbs & in them good ole rural parts of the country (also known as the "pro-America" parts, I hear), here's a snapshot of the hallway outside my apartment as my next-door neighbor moved out. Mind you, this was a day-&-a-half-long process - as in, that sofa sat in the hallway for 24+ hours. I've been missing Halloween back in Ohio, but who needs suburban corn mazes when I can experience this furniture maze right here in my own dwelling?
In actuality, the old neighbor was a young cop, a really nice guy, & I'm bummed that he's gone. Now living in his place are a few Russian chain-smokers who come & go at all hours of the day & night, which is really great for me, considering my headboard rests right next to their often-slamming door. Based upon their frequent foot traffic, I have concluded that they may or may not be the mafia or a drug cartel, with an accent on "may."
OK, OK. I did think my old neighbor (yes, the cop) was secretly a serial killer based on weird bumps in the night I heard from his place, so it's entirely possible that my new neighbors are perfectly upstanding individuals with some really legitimate explanation for the crazy hours they keep. Who knows. I've been reading too much Bret Easton Ellis, & I'm sticking with the criminality theories.