Sorry I'm Not Sorry: A List of Things I've Apologized for This Week

Sorry I'm Not Sorry: A List of Things I've Apologized for This Week

Monday, November 18, 2013

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Because I have a notoriously terrible memory, I'm prone to keeping lists of things in my phone, just so I can keep track of them. Sometimes the lists are "important," like workout routines & stuff I need to pick up from the grocery store. Most of them, though, are less vital: to-do items before I turn 30, things I'd rather spend my money on than car repairs, scenes from Dawson's Creek that have made me cry. Recently, I added a new list to the, uh, list: "Things I've Apologized for Lately." After a week of keeping this list, here's a peek at what it looks like.

I have apologized for:

• Taking more than one tweet to finish a sentence
• Telling someone my name was Kate when my account was listed under Sara
• Missing the initial call when a delivery guy rang to let me know he'd arrived
• Pushing my cat off the couch
• Using an exclamation point in a text where no exclamation point belonged
• Spelling my name too quickly when the Apple guy was making an appointment for me
• Being a huge bitch to the two Apple employees who were trying to help me get a new phone after I shattered mine 
• Ugly-crying at the Apple store in front of a lot of people
• Walking sort of in the vicinity of another person on a public sidewalk
• Leaving work an hour early after I had a legitimate & terrible panic attack
• Coming home from work early on my boyfriend's day off (you know, in case I'd interrupted his me-time)
• Asking a busy barista a totally valid question about Starbucks' Veterans Day discount
• Not responding in a timely manner to a text asking about Nickelodeon's GUTS
• Almost being slammed into headfirst by a guy who was texting & walking
• Being too busy during the workday to have a full & focused phone conversation with my mom
• Gchatting with a friend & rambling about some things I've been stressed about
• Canceling a session with my personal trainer
• Napping for an hour longer than I meant to
• Not making pumpkin cheesecake for my boyfriend to take to work, like I said I would
• Taking five days to respond to a personal email
• Not knowing the difference between registered & certified USPS mail
• Asking a stranger at Starbucks to keep an eye on my laptop while I ran to the bathroom
• Following up with someone for a third time after I didn't hear back from her on a fairly time-sensitive request 
• Saying something to my boyfriend that hurt his feelings
• Eating a sandwich during a video chat meeting
• Taking sort of a long time to remove files from my iPad & reset it
• Not being prepared to discuss something my boss sprung on me at a meeting
• Emailing the IT department with a sort-of-dumb question
• My debit card inexplicably not working & a cafe worker having to manually type in my card number instead
• Working late (er, 6:30pm)
• Not having the emotional energy to travel home to Ohio for Christmas
• Tweeting while drunk
• Being sick on a weekend 
• Dragging my boyfriend to Urgent Care with me on a Saturday
• Not turning on my video during a conference call because I was sick
• Arriving two minutes late to a conference call
• Muting myself on a conference call because someone was mowing the lawn outside my apartment window
• Asking my boss to re-send me a password because the one she'd previously sent was incorrect
• Asking a coworker if we could have a one-on-one call to discuss something he needed me to do for him because I wasn't totally clear on it after a fleeting team conversation
• Using the phrase "Twitter famous"

And these are just the ones I thought to write down. Do you know how many of these "apologies," out of the thirty-nine of them that I recorded, were actual apologies that needed to be made? Two. Yes, two. I shouldn't have made that comment to my boyfriend that hurt his feelings, & it was rude of me to yell at the Apple folks who were trying to help me, even if they were telling me I owed them $300. The rest? Were wholly unnecessary.

It's colloquial, I suppose, the word "sorry." We say it when we mean "excuse me"; we say it when someone is going through a difficult time, even if it has nothing to do with us; we say it about little things & big things alike; we say it about things that certainly don't require us to be sorry or even apologetic; we say it when what we really mean is, "I know this has been a small inconvenience upon you & I want to absolve myself of any guilt for my involvement in that."

It is apparently a widespread myth that the Eskimos have an unusually large number of words to mean "snow." Still, I can't help but think of this claim when I think more about the word "sorry." How often are we really sorry? What does "sorry" even mean? Isn't there some other word we could use for "I know this has been a small inconvenience upon you & I want to absolve myself of any guilt for my involvement in that"? Because that's too many words to use 39 times a week, but I'm also tired of saying I'm sorry when I'm not really sorry at all.

When we say we're sorry for 37 ridiculous things that do not require our apologies, do we demean the two that do? Does "I'm sorry" lose its meaning when we use it for everything? Because I don't think "using an exclamation point in a text where no exclamation point belongs" & "hurting the feelings of someone I care deeply about" deserve the same reaction from me.

I'm tired of apologizing for my existence. I'm not sorry anymore - unless I am, in which case, you'll know that I mean it.

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A Place for Everybody, No Matter How Weird

A Place for Everybody, No Matter How Weird

Thursday, September 20, 2012

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Every time I write about my attempts to meet people & make friends as an adult, about a billion people comment to tell me that I should checkout Meetup.com. I recently joined a bunch of Meetup.com groups, which means I now get constant emails about events that might interest me – and mostly, at this point, events that don't. Still, I'm hopeful that something will, sooner or later, look like it's worth attending, & I'll meet some supercool new BFFs & we'll all live happily ever after.

While I did find five groups worth joining, I had to sort through some muck to get to them. I've been told there's a meetup for everyone, &, well, now I believe it. Want to see some of my favorites?OK, if you insist.

• If the guy in the blue jacket is 40, then I am a senior citizen.
  
• From the theme of the group to the name given to members, this group screams "INDOOR KIDS!" What is that a picture of, anyway? A nunchuck-wielding cartoon cockroach standing in a field of grass? The food allergy people are breaking out in hives at the thought of standing in a field.
  
• You can't fool me. This looks like the saddest festival.
  
• I wish I had a child. If I did, I would join this group with full expectations that my infant would sprout wings ~n~ become teacup sized. This photo sets a really high bar, moms.
  
• This one speaks for itself, right?
  
• I'm tempted to join this group so that I can finally learn how to fulfill my lifelong dream of becoming one of those people (usually a dreadlocked dude, but whatever) who plays the drums outside the Chinatown Metro Station in D.C., in which "drums" are just upside-down buckets. It looks like the members of this group do that in their living rooms, a hobby my neighbors would surely appreciate.
  
• Is this group in the business of investing in red velvet cupcakes? If so, count me in. If not, I'm really confused.
  
• "Join us at the oldest meetup in the land!"
  
• This group is maybe not that weird, except that it reminds me of my favorite John Mulaney joke ("Imma push him!"), which Nathan & I quote way too often, & that cracks me up. But actually, you know what? This is that weird. "Pushing Hands of Monmouth County"? Huh?!
   
• I wish this group were just about pizza discovery, because then I'd be so in.
• This group is so sad because there's only one person in it. "NEW JERSEY PODCASTER, UNITE!"
  
• This photo accurately describes the group it represents, which actually sounds like the cutest group of all time (assuming that the babies in that other group don't actually have wings), but I'm including it in this list because, really? Are you telling me that almost 300 people in the area own shiba inus?!
  
• You are single because it's 2012 & you still don't know how to crop and/or rotate a jpeg.
  
• Sister goddesses, huh? I'm thinking that this group is made up of Mormon polygamist women who are also 50 Shades of Grey fans. Forty-four of them, shockingly.
  
• Once I learned that this group was for members of the special needs community and their parents/guardians, I thought I shouldn't include it in this list. But then I decided, "You know what? This belongs here." Presumably, the person who started the group is not a member of the special needs community, & he or she should be ashamed of giving this otherwise great group such an offensively hackneyed, cliche name. I feel mad on behalf of all the people in this group who don't know that they should be mad about it.
  
• My first thought was that this group was for people who are, you know, mulling transitions. More people who just moved here? Like me? Cool. Turns out, it's actually for "building a sustainable locality" & "strengthening community resilience," & because I'm not sure what either of those really means – paired with the fact that their last two events were a "Re-Purposeful Sewing Potluck" and "Picking Wild Wine Berries" – I don't think this is the group for me.
  
• This group appears to have found the Loch Ness Monster, which means I appear to have found the perfect group for me. Case closed.
  

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Ain't No Trip to Ohio: A Play-By-Play

Ain't No Trip to Ohio: A Play-By-Play

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

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I went to Ohio for Memorial Day Weekend. As you may/should know, I LOVE OHIO. I'm Buckeye State born & bred, having attended three Ohio public schools & two of Ohio's state colleges. Others may mock it, reminding me that Ohio is often named the place where never-to-be-heard-from-again TV & film characters move (see: "Friends," "Tommy Boy," & a myriad of others). But this weekend, I traveled back to my beloved home state with a coworker, her younger brother & his friend. They were bound for an Ultimate Frisbee tournament (?!) & I figured I'd stay with my aunts & visit some old friends, though some of those plans worked out better than others. Since I was away from a computer & thus unable to blog, I tweeted my entire visit. If you follow me on Twitter, feel free to ignore this tweet-by-tweet summary; if you don't, enjoy!


PS: Upon re-reading these tweets, it basically appears as though I despised my trip to Ohio. Perhaps I need to work on my emotional tweeting. It's sort of like emotional eating, but more publicly shameful.

Friday
6:19 PM: Buckeye-bound! Columbus, ho!

6:19 PM: Dashboard Confessional flashbacks on this roadtrip. The 18-year-olds are asleep in the back seat & we got all kinds of time to rock.

7:00 PM: Live-tweeting my roadtrip to Ohio. Tune in for farmhouses, hills, fast food restaurants & bathroom breaks.

7:34 PM: Certainly almost just died. Ironic that the car that almost nailed us has a license plate that reads "KEEPHOPE."

7:53 PM: "Welcome to West Virginia: Wild and Wonderful!"

8:21 PM: Playing some pretty bad trivia. Not a radio station to be found for miles.

8:48 PM: Riding a motorcycle does not give you permission to wear a lace-up leather vest.

8:53 PM: Proof that there is a God & (S)He loves us: We just discovered a Hanson "Middle of Nowhere" tape. Hear that? A TAPE! Thanks, universe.

9:13 PM: Why do I still remember every single lyric to songs I haven't heard since 1997?

9:14 PM: How did we end up in WVa. again???

9:34 PM: BDubs! Eat 'n' Park! Applebee's! Guess where? O-H..!

9:41 PM: Come on, guys. O-H! Anyone...?

10:00 PM: I'm about to be a Columbus nomad. Got zero plans.

10:16 PM Daniel ordered four sandwiches at Wendy's - 3 & a half hours ago. and is eating the last of them now. The car reeks of meat (& botchulism).

11:26 PM: Wrong turn. Driving fairly aimlessly around Columbus. Welcome to the Buckeye State.

11:55 PM: Too tired to be awake & hanging out with the Washington University Women's Ultimate Frisbee team (which I don't know any players on...)

12:27 AM: Ghettoest bar ever. At OSU. Smells like pee. Playing "Brass Monkey." $1 cover - why bother???

12:46 AM: We're greasy & have been in the car for 8 hours. I'm wearing a 1994 tee-ball t-shirt. Do not hit on me, weirdo.

1:53 AM: After the creeper came two legitimately cute guys, one a Jew. Who is clearly interested, despite my unattractiveness tonight. Curious...

2:06 AM: Dear cute boy: Please email me like you said you would?

Saturday
9:55 AM: I do not feel rested in any sense of the word. Thanks, fold-out couch & really loud dog.

10:09 AM: I wish my family weren't so painfully unlike me.

11:55 AM: Dear Ohio: Thanks for having Quaker Steak & Lube. I wish I were going there instead of the freaking Cheesecake Factory for lunch right now.

12:48 PM: Epic breakfast burrito: http://yfrog.com/5apb2j

1:02 PM: I hate everything.

3:05 PM: This weather makes me tired enough to fall asleep in my mom's car.

3:26 PM: It was so warm inside Old Navy that I can now do nothing but sit on the couch & pant & be thankful that I found two new pairs of jeans.

5:31 PM: I suspect that this afternoon's epic breakfast burrito is the culprit behind this evening's intestinal mutiny. Tums, anyone? Ow.

7:16 PM: At an Ultimate Frisbee tournament. So uninterested but attempting not to be a douchebag. Mostly just jealous I don't/can't play any sports.

8:37 PM: When my lease runs out (a year from Tuesday), I'm moving to Columbus. Count on it.

8:50 PM: I remembered I don't actually like Great Lakes Eliot Ness. I was just really jazzed to be someplace that had Great Lakes.

10:42 PM: Meeting up with @ohhitsjustmeg at Little Bar, the most unGoogleable bar in this city.

12:12 AM: This bar's packed with trendy, pretty girls - but the kind who somehow make me proud to be here wearing Chucks & a t-shirt instead.

12:40: Hazards of hanging out with old friends inlude being reminded of what an unlikeable f*ck-up I used to be. Not loving memory lane tonight.

1:25 AM: I think my quick temper might freak out my friends.

1:45 AM: Bagel sandwich, potato pancakes & a chocolate malt for $5.49. I LOVE THE MIDWEST.

1:58 AM: "Thanks for taking us to Steak & Shake." "Thanks for giving me an excuse to admit to going somewhere I was going to sneak off to anyway."

Sunday
12:17 PM: Amazing piece of Sanskrit art my aunt made me (watercolor & colored pencil): http://yfrog.com/17a86j

1:15 PM: Indy 500: Sucks to wipe out in the first lap. Don't judge me for watching!

1:23 PM: Nothing beats drinking cherry Koolaid & watching the Indy 500 on a sunny day. Waiting for Moraes to wig on Andretti.

2:43 PM: Every single girl on the Stanford Ultimate Frisbee Team could beat the living daylights out of me. And they're all five feet tall.

7:00 PM: I'm ready to go back to DC now. I wish I could teleport.

7:51 PM: I know I tweeted this two days ago, but... I hate everything.

9:03 PM: Step it up, #Cavs. I'm watching from Quaker Steak & Lube, and I want to watch a win while I'm home.

9:46 PM: Quaker belly.

11:06 PM: "Hitch" is NOT comparable to the fourth quarter of the #Cavs game.

11:10 PM: Who's winning?!?! My aunt says it's not on, which can NOT POSSIBLY be true.

Monday
11:04 AM: I fashioned some earplugs out of a wet cotton ball & slept like a freaking rock.

11:39 AM: It's pretty clear that Jon & Kate Gosselin can't stand one another. Uhh, that's what you get for having an army's worth of kids.

12:41 PM: I'm going insane. I need to get on the road back to the District immediately.

1:14 PM: My aunts are making plans to travel to Iowa to finally get married!!!!

1:42 PM: The Midwest makes it really easy to be fat.

4:01 PM: Live-tweeting my return to DC. Enjoy! It begins with a kid at a rest stop named Cannon. As in, "Boom!"

4:41 PM: Passed a hitchhiker in West Virginia. Those still exist?!

5:34 PM: It's raining in West Virginia, which sounds like some sort of country song. And speaking of country, decent radio is non-existent out here.

6:31 PM: Fell asleep pretty hard through Maryland. Neck cracked like I was breaking something. Yowza.

7:16 PM: Did Chik-Fil-A really invent the chicken sandwich or is this just a brilliant marketing ploy dependent upon gullible customers?

7:38 PM: My friend is now quizzing her brother on principles of macroeconomics. Pardon me while I zone the eff out.

7:48 PM: Driving into the apocalypse somewhere mid-Maryland, where an epic, Biblical-style storm appears to be brewing.

9:29 PM: LIL WAYNE ON THE IPHONE TO END THE ROADTRIP!

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Size Does Matter

Size Does Matter

Monday, October 27, 2008

4 comments

One thing I can safely say of MoveOn.org is that they're clearly not particularly concerned about the environmental effects of excess packaging. This observation is based on the Obama button I received from said organization this week &, more specifically, on the envelope it arrived it. A size comparison is as follows:

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My Blogskillz Bring All the Boys to the Yard...

My Blogskillz Bring All the Boys to the Yard...

Thursday, October 16, 2008

1 comment

The glory that is Google Analytics allows me to browse the Google keywords that cause people to stumble upon my little blog. Some of them are, frankly, incredible. I love it. Ready? Commentary included, of course!

• "jdate" (Lonely, single Jews searching for their soulmates.)
  
• "sara jay" (Fans of the porn star I met on my birthday hoping for nudie pics)
  
• "1 br dupont circle" (Folks looking to move into one-room shacks like mine)
  
• "bar-b-quin with my honey" (Someone looking for Rap Snacks!)
  
• "bow tied men" (A lady interested in classy gents)
  
• "bow to men" (Some subservient woman?)
  
• "buckeyes for boobies shirt" (I HAVE NO IDEA. How is this relevant to me?)
  
• "cinematic concepts in goodbye lenin!" (College film major)
  
• "city wife" (How did you get to ME? My apologies.)
  
• "class of spiders daddy longleg where dose it hange out" (Some poor arachnophobe)
  
• "day time hooker" (Governor Elliott Spitzer)
  
• "feel the power between my legs" (Armageddon fan... or huge perv)
  
• "four and a half punctuation" (A grammarian led astray)
  
• "glenmont metro and tow" (Some sad Marylander with a broken down vehicle)
  
• "is there a city name sweetheart" (Someone hoping I constitute an entire city)
  
• "metacarpal contusion" (Some sad sack with a broken hand who hopefully has quieter neighbors than I had)
  
• "musical metro" (Not sure... but they no doubt ended up with the story of my attempted murder last autumn)
  
• "my sweet babe" (Sweet-talker)
• "navy wife" (Again with the wives flocking to me for reasons unknown...)
  
• "ohio porn stars" (More Sara Jay seekers?)
  
• "palin" (There's no way I'm even in the top 1,000 results for this, so someone was REALLY dedicated in terms of vetting their Google results on this one.)
  
• "porn star jan b" (PERVS LOVE ME)
  
• "sex" (See my comments for "Palin," incidentally)
  
• "she makes the city seem like home" (Anberlin fan! Emo kid!)
  
• "sole decision" (Someone looking for shoes?)
  
• "sweetheart coffee cincinnati" (Beats me.)
  
• "sweetheart cupcake i'll be there for sure" (Beats me, part two.)
  
• "the machinist schizophrenia" (Christian Bale fan. Or someone with a mental illness. Whichev.)
  

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Cinematic Schizophrenia

Cinematic Schizophrenia

Monday, August 18, 2008

5 comments

Based on Netflix's list of the top 25 most popular rentals in the Washington, D.C. area, I LIVE IN THE MOST BORING CITY ON THE PLANET. They are as follows:

1. The War Room
2. All the President's Men
3. K Street: The Complete Series
4. L'Auberge Espagnole
5. The Syrian Bride
6. The Candidate
7. Gilmore Girls: Season 3
8. The Boys of Baraka
9. 2046
10. Paradise Now
11. Russian Dolls
12. Can Mr. Smith Get to Washington Anymore?
13. The Manchurian Candidate
14. The West Wing: Season 4
15. Lost Boys of Sudan
16. Good Bye, Lenin!
17. MI-5: Vol. 4
18. Nueve Reinas
19. Central do Brasil
20. La Battaglia di Algeri
21. The Fog of War: Eleven Lessons From the Life of Robert S. McNamara
22. La Haine
23. The West Wing: Season 5
24. The West Wing: Season 2
25. The Wire: Season 4

[Note: Please don't think I haven't noticed that, as the children's song goes, "one of those things is not like the other ones."]

Comparatively, my own personal Netflix queue contains the following 25 movies (with commentary, of course):

1. Smart People (although I dislike Ellen Page)
2. Dan in Real Life (Steve Carrell does semi-seriousness?)
3. Semi-Pro (Touted as one of Will Ferrell's funniest?)
4. Friends with Money (Don't even remember what this is about)
5. Into the Wild (Could end up like Castaway -- terrible)
6. Read it and Weep (a Disney Channel original)
7. College Road Trip (starring Raven-Symone)
8. Footoose (Obligatory classic musical)
9. I’m Not There (Netflix gives it a 1.5 star rating)
10. Jawbreaker (Blatant rip-off of Heathers)
11. The Lake House (Widely touted as being... shitty)
12. Harold and Maude (Am not going to like this but felt obligated to try)
13. The Machinist (Love me some rail-thin Christian Bale)
14. The Break-Up (Also touted as terrible)
15. Fool’s Gold (Just for the McConaughey body shots)
16. Lars and the Real Girl (Creepy concept)
17. Monster’s Ball (Billy Bob AND Puff Daddy!)
18. Bringing Down the House (Yep, with Queen Latifah & Steve Martin.)
19. Fur (What IS this?!)
20. Running with Scissors (Will probably make me hate the book)
21. Little Children (Suburban scandal)
22. Match Point (Turns out Topher Grace is NOT in this. Damn.)
23. No Country for Old Men (Obligatory award-winner)
24. The Big Lebowski (Seriously never seen it!)
25. Maria Full of Grace (Cocaine smuggling goes artsy.)

Based on cinematic preference, should I be living elsewhere? The answer, it seems, is clear. But where? Disneyworld? The '90s? High school? Christian Bale's bed? A psych ward? Discuss.

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Musical Metro Chairs & the Guessing Game that Goes with It

Musical Metro Chairs & the Guessing Game that Goes with It

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

1 comment

Decisions, decisions.

There's a fine art to deciding who to sit next to on the Metro. The ideal situation is to sit in one seat of a free pair of seats, thus avoiding the problem entirely. But often, as was the case this a.m., no pair of seats will be totally open, and there begins the dilemma. If I choose not to choose & to stand instead, it will not go unnoticed -- when I watch people choose not to choose & to stand instead, I always wonder, "What's wrong with me that you don't want to sit next to me?" before, of course, relishing my space.

Anyways, the dilemma. For obvious reasons, I am wary of sitting next to the Sketchy-Looking Middle-Aged Man, the one who hasn't leered at me yet but can be guaranteed to re-situate after my arrival to ensure that his grey-haired arm brushes mine in the most inescapable of sitting positions.

I am equally hesitant to sit next to the Obese Woman Who Needs 1.5 Seats. She looks friendly, yes, & in theory is probably a safe bet, but the truth is that no matter how rockin' my bod may be, my ass is simply too large to fit in the half a seat this woman's presence has provided me with. I swallow a bubble of guilt -- she knows why no one's sitting there yet -- & move along.

I'd sit next to the Friendly Indie High Schooler, he of the floppy hair, welcoming smile & H&M scarf, but somehow it makes me feel like a creep. Although I'm a fan of the Ting Tings album emitting loudly from his iPod Touch, it seems somehow pedophiliac of me to opt for the seat next to a teen when every other option would place me next to a real person... er... legal adult.

I hesitate to sit next to others, too: Questionably Sane Man Muttering to Himself, Sleeping Guy At Risk of Drooling on My Knees, Shopper Toting Entirely Too Many Bloomingdale's Bags, Zealot Highlighting Biblical Passages...

I repeat: decisions, decisions. In the end, I chose the Friendly Indie High Schooler, primarily for the soundtrack that came with him.

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Playing Visual Chicken with an Observant Redline Scribbler

Playing Visual Chicken with an Observant Redline Scribbler

Friday, November 16, 2007

3 comments

Have you ever played that game where one person holds out both hishands, & the other person holds hers right below? The person whose hands are on the bottom tries to smack the person whose hands are on top, while the top person tries to be quicker & pull his hands out before he can be smacked.

That made zero sense. Please tell me you know what I mean.

Anyway, I played the eye-contact version of that game yesterday night with a woman on the train. I noticed her as soon as I got on, mostly because she was wearing a fringed coat... & who does that? But I also noticed her because she had huge, unblinking eyes & because where most passengers listen to iPods or read books or newspapers, this woman was holding a notebook & pen.

I think she must have been just observing, writing down whatever she noticed about whoever was sitting around her. Every time I sneaked a peek, she looked away & stopped writing, her crazybig eyes freaking the heck out of me.

I wonder why she was writing.

And more interestingly... I wonder what she wrote.

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Three Straight Days of Metro Exhaustion

Three Straight Days of Metro Exhaustion

Sunday, September 23, 2007

1 comment

The people in Washington, D.C., are permanently exhausted. This is especially apparent on public transportation, which many commuters take as an opportunity to get some quick shut-eye. On any given Metro ride, especially early in the morning, everyone from the businessmen to the schoolchildren has their heads down, relishing the short window of time before they have to begin the daily grind... & perhaps cursing the long commutes that keep them from staying in bed a few minutes longer in the first place.

This week, I had three experiences with big-city fatigue:

Day One -- Absent-Minded Monday

• I never listen to my iPod on mornings when I'm really tired because I quickly discovered that if I start to doze off on the Metro ride, my headphones (I eschew the use of "earbuds") keep me from hearing the driver's announcements.
  
  On Monday, it doesn't matter. Even sans music, I not only "doze off" but straight-up pass out. When I wake up - groggy, confused & with my contacts suctioned to my eyeballs - the train doors are closing on the Tenleytown/AU stop... which is a whopping four stops past mine. I hop off at Friendship Heights, five stops past, & promptly turn around to travel back down the redline.
  
  I am an idiot.

Day Two -- Tuckered-Out Tuesday

• The next day, I try to accommodate my apparent need of sleep by napping in my car before work. I typically drive to the Metro around 7a.m. to get a spot at the parking deck, even though this means I arrive at work about 45 minutes early. So I figure I'll nap in my car after I park, then jump on the Metro around 8a.m., which would get me in to work right on time. Ghetto, yes, but a girl's gotta snag beauty sleep where she can get it.
  
  I fall asleep in my car, as planned... & sleep through my alarm. In my car. When I wake up - groggy, confused & with my contacts suctioned to my eyeballs - it's nearly 8:25. To top it off, the train stalls for 10 minutes, & I am 15 minutes late to work.

Day Three -- Thankful Thursday

• On my way home from work, I spy this guy asleep on the redline to Glenmont, his mouth wide open, not flinching at all when the stops are announced.
  
  
  
  Yeah, he's out. When we get to Forest Glen, he jolts awake, looking around frantically & sort of panting in worry.
  
  "Forest Glen," I call over to him - we're the only two people left on the train.
  
  "Was I snoring?" he asks. I assure him that he wasn't, feeling a little bit guilty for having just taken his picture.
  
  "I would've woken you up when we got to Glenmont," I promise. He thanks me profusely, then puts his head back down until our stop comes.

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Wasting my Wallet Away

Wasting my Wallet Away

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

8 comments

This is me, selling my soul to the city for $295.83 (or more) a week.

8/22 --- Kramerbooks, “The Rules of Attraction” --- $14.75
8/22 --- Buffalo Billiards, one draft Yuengling --- $6.50
8/22 --- Starbucks, grande iced chai latte (with gift card) --- $1.62
8/23 --- Elephant & Castle, happy hour --- $13.00
8/23 --- Starbucks, venti iced chai latte --- $5.89
8/23 --- Starbucks, grande iced chai latte --- $5.28
8/23 --- Potbelly's, chicken salad sandwich --- $4.61
8/27 --- CVS, assorted necessities (i.e. shoe inserts) --- $43.71
8/27 --- CVS, assorted necessities, part dos (i.e. eyeliner) --- $15.77
8/27 --- ATM withdrawal --- $20.00
8/27 --- Washington D.C. Metro, SmarTrip card --- $20.00
8/27 --- The Big Hunt, two Yuenglings --- $11.50
8/27 --- Google.com, new domain name --- $10.00
8/27 --- Starbucks, grande iced Passion tea & sandwich --- $7.04
8/27 --- Starbucks, grande iced chai latte & croissant --- $6.22
8/27 --- Baja Fresh, bean burrito & churro --- $5.43
Pending --- Kramerbooks, “Glamorama” --- $15.81
Pending --- Tortilla Coast, chicken flautas & three Bud Lites --- $18.00
Pending --- Washington D.C. Metro, SmarTrip addition --- $60.05
Pending --- Starbucks, grande blueberry frap & croissant --- $6.60
Pending --- McDonald’s, egg McMuffin --- $4.05

HOLY SHEIST. This ain't gon' last long, folks.

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