2022 in Review: Honestly Kind of a Lot

2022 in Review: Honestly Kind of a Lot

Friday, December 30, 2022

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For once, I've mostly kept this list throughout the year instead of trying to compile it all at the end of December. It's been a helpful way to reflect on the year as it passes, not just once it's already passed.
  
This was actually a pretty good year, but it certainly had its fair share of troubles, from infertility to job stress to other health issues and overall self-esteem struggles.  We didn't do much travel, preferring instead to stay close to home to enjoy our new house and just be a little cozy, which was a nice change from years past but doesn't necessarily make for a fun end-of-year roundup.
 
But the joy was in the small things, the dinners with friends and experiences out on the town. It was in decorating our new home, honing our cooking skills, hosting friends and family at the holidays and throughout the year. It was feeling suburban in a good way. It was growing up and settling in.
  
Here are some highlights.

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A Letter to My Boxing Friends

A Letter to My Boxing Friends

Wednesday, December 28, 2022

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A letter to you, my PGB friends,

I’ve never done very well in groups. I was in a sorority in college, and it was one of the worst experiences of my life. I’ve never felt more out of place, more alienated, more unworthy of friendship. And even though I’ve successfully been a part of multiple friend groups since then, that experience has always stuck with me. It’s become a deep and inextricable part of the story that I tell myself about myself, like it’s a fact — I have brown hair, I have a loud voice, and I don’t do very well in groups.

This year, though, had been the year that I’ve started rewriting that part of my story — and so much of it is thanks to you, the women in this room and the others who have been here throughout the year, even briefly and in passing. Every single person and every single interaction in this gym and on GroupMe and during our social events has taught me not only about all of you but also about myself. 

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Welcome (or Not) to New York. It's Been Waiting for You.

Welcome (or Not) to New York. It's Been Waiting for You.

Tuesday, December 13, 2022

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I was supposed to go to New York City last weekend for what would've been my first visit since spring 2019. It was the third time in three years that I have canceled a planned trip to the city.

I don't know why, but visiting New York seems incredibly overwhelming to me post-pandemic. Obviously many, many other people live there, and they're managing just fine, but to me, New York seems very much like the before times, like a different version of my life wherein I was a different person who had different abilities that I have now inexplicably lost. 

I used to pride myself on how easy it was for me to manage in New York, even as this lifelong Midwesterner who should, for all intents and purposes, have absolutely no idea what to do in a city that damn big. It always felt normal to me, the rushing and the observing and the rude-when-you're-in-a-hurry-but-kind-when-you're-not vibes that New Yorkers have.

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Always Iterating (and Other Thoughts About the Evolution of This Blog)

Always Iterating (and Other Thoughts About the Evolution of This Blog)

Saturday, December 10, 2022

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I have a few friends who write newsletters, like through TinyLetter and Substack. I don't always read them, but when I do, I am blown away by them — by their storytelling, their vulnerability, their honesty, their intimacy. Sometimes, it feels a little bit like reading someone else's diary. 

In a lot of ways, it feels like the old days of blogging. 

The other night, after reading a particularly beautiful newsletter, I found myself contemplating starting a one of my own. About five minutes into my brainstorming, I stopped to ask myself: Wait. Why? Why, when I've had this blog for nearly fifteen years, would I need a different place for different writing? Why not just put it all here? 

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