
As a self-professed social media aficionado, & I would never discount the value of Facebook in today's society. Facebook is good for a lot of things. It's good for keeping up on long-distance friends' lives, of course, & for promoting my blog. It's good for crowd-sourcing tough questions ("Does anyone know of a good dentist?" & other such pressing topics) & for sharing interesting news stories ("Rodent of Unusual Size Killed With Pitchfork in Brooklyn!"). It's good for following my favorite organizations' advocacy work, participating in contests I will likely never but still might possibly win, & finding deals & coupons from my favorite brands. All of these are reasons why, in the end, I could probably never give up Facebook - nor would I really want to.
Still, I needed to teach myself a lesson: to learn not to rely on Facebook for interactions with friends & family. And perhaps more importantly, to spend less of my precious time comparing my own life to the lives of others - and more time focusing on my own life. I don't have very many vices, but social media, as much as I love it, is one of them - and Facebook was becoming an impediment to my life. This is why last Wednesday, on a whim, I deactivated my Facebook account (only, I should note, after making SURE that all of my tagged photos would be there when I return).
I haven't really missed it yet, though admittedly it's only been three & a half days. I think my blog traffic is down without NetworkedBlogs broadcasting my new posts to my hundreds of Facebook friends, & there are times when I want to check on things, like when my friend Jenn's new baby is due or whether my friend Annie has moved in with her fiancé yet. But you know what? I can ask them. Like, myself - and if I don't take the time to ask them, maybe I didn't care that much to begin with. So far, what I haven't missed is wasting my work hours browsing the profiles of people I rarely speak to, & I haven't missed the stress of feeling like I have to respond to every wall post or inbox message.
Also of note: Before I deactivated, I deleted about 400 "friends" from my account, including nearly all of my sorority sisters, colleagues who friended me despite my unease about mixing business & social media, & a bunch of girls I went to high school with who were recently rude to me when I saw them at a hometown bar. I did away with anyone whose life made me irrationally jealous, anyone whose updates consistently made me roll my eyes, & anyone I'd friended just to be polite in some moment that had long passed. I'm now down to, um, 880, but having once been at 1,500+, this is a massive improvement.
Hasta la vista, Facebook. I'll be back - soon, probably. But I'm hopeful that when I do come back, I'll remember this little lesson in social media restraint & how relieved I felt to disconnect a bit - even if my disconnectivity translates only into more sleep & more time to watch "Drop Dead Diva." (I'm using this time to determine what's important to me, & hey, relaxation is important to me!) I'm not going to use Facebook to make me feel bad about myself or my life anymore. And if I want to connect with people? Well, people did that before Facebook existed, & I'm pretty sure there are still other ways to do it.
Call me a hypocrite, but for right now, "I'm not on Facebook anymore." And you know what? It feels pretty good.
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