Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Readin' Good & Votin' for Rockstars

Sometimes I think there should be some sort of IQ test citizens are required to take before they're allowed to vote. But based on my experiences in attempting to vote last week, I wouldn't have passed, by my own standards.

My friend Sean & I decided to avoid the dreaded Election Day lines by voting early at the Summit County Board of Elections, where neither of us had ever been. We Google Mapped it & were on our merry, democratic way.

But when we arrived, the doors were locked. But only because we failed to read a sign that said to use a different set of doors. But those were locked, too. But only because we failed to read three ginormous yard signs, printed in block letters, directing would-be early voters to a satellite location a few miles away. Reading/planning fail.

It seems, though, that the Summit County BOE is eager to make its voters feel welcome - & to eliminate reading problems wherever possible. Case in point: this massive sign. If we'd missed this one, we'd have had a real comprehension problem on our hands. And look! They'd even reserved a parking spot for us! Whew. The joint was really jumpin', as you can tell:


This satellite location was, like, an old Sam's Club or something, a big, echo-y warehouse with tinted sliding glass doors. The kind of place where creepy men take teenage women after they've abducted them. But instead of abuctors or gang members (because shoot-'em-up scenes & bank heist planning always occurs in old warehouses), we entered to find approximately 16 staffers milling about - despite the fact that Sean & I were the only ones casting our early ballots.

The point of this post is three-fold. Firstly, I wanted you to know that I am apparently unable to read. Secondly, that voting is important & that you should exercise your democractic right/responsibility by doing it, either now or come November 2nd. But most importantly, you should do it the correct way. Lucky for you, the Summit County BOE has an easy how-to guide posted in each voting booth:


I hope Janis wins, but she probably won't get enough votes, so, you know, I'm rooting for Ted Strickland instead.
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