An Indoor Kid's Unexpected Revelation About the Outdoors

Saturday, June 29, 2013

Blanket statement: I don't like hot weather. This is in part because I am the absolute sweatiest & in part because... well, mostly because of sweating. But also because of things like sunburns & frizzy hair & having to wear clothes that reveal things I don't like revealing, like arm fat. For the most part, I just don't like hot weather because it's not cold weather, which I really love. Winterfell is my jam, bro.

A lot of people don't understand this, of course, & think I must be broken. When I tell people Nathan is in the Coast Guard, approximately 75% of people say something like, "At least you'll always live near a beach!" This would be cool, if I had any desire to ever go to beaches, which I do not not.

Until yesterday?

Yesterday, I woke up to an amazing view outside my hotel window in Fort Lauderdale & thought, "Imma go hang out there today." I had to give a presentation for work in the morning, & as nervous as I was, I got through it by reminding myself that when I was done, I was going to go relax on the beach.

And I did.

And I liked it.

I bought myself a spray can of SPF 70, which Nathan told me is "like wearing a jacket to the beach," & slathered up my pasty-white skin. I put on my black one-piece bathing suit from Land's End, which I suspect is geared mostly toward a much older demographic than the one I'm in but which makes me feel kind of pretty. I rented two towels from the front desk & marched out to the shore, where I promptly claimed a lounge chair & took a few "OMG I'M AT THE BEACH" Instagram pics. And then I laid out there for, like, an hour & a half. And then I did it again today. It was sweaty, yes, but it was also so relaxing, & the water was so blue, & I felt so peaceful & blissed out that I couldn't possibly care. Hey, all that sweat & sunscreen & saltwater even made my hair look great!

And all was right with the world - especially when I remembered that I live at the Jersey Shore & can do this any time I want.


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