Freaky Friday: The Flasher & the Fighter

Friday, January 2, 2009

Tonight I experienced a double-whammy of city livin'. While trying to convince a cranky security guard to let me into a locked building to deposit my (late) rent check, a man with very, very few teeth sidled up & yelled, "Me, too! I got rent!" The security guard ignored him, focusing on me & my fast-emerging teardrops, until he turned back to the man in shock & yelled, "Sir! ZIP UP YOUR FLY!" Against my better judgment, I did the unthinkable - I looked down. The man quickly followed the security guard's instructions & hurried away, but you get the picture -- I know I haven't been getting any action lately, but that was certainly not a welcome view.

Don't worry. The security guard dropped off my rent for me.

And after that, I headed into the Van Ness Metro station to make my way home for a fun-filled night of movie-watching. As I attempted to hustle past a group of people -- excuse me: of ESCALEFTERS -- to hurry into the station, one of the girls blocking my way passively refused to move, saying brusquely, "Read our sign!" Hers read "STOP THE MASSACRE OF PALESTINIANS." I gave the sign a sideways glance, knowing full well that she was one of the "peace" protesters who'd just come from the hundreds-deep rally outside the Israeli Embassy. And as I tried to scoot past them & their signs in silence, she yelled something to the effect of, "Doesn't that mean anything to you? Are you just like every other American?" I slid past without saying a word.

Needless to say, by night's end I felt pretty violated on more than one level.


  1. I love your blog!!! Thank you so much for commenting on mine so I could find you!

  2. Ah the typical DC combo - a belligerent homeless person and a self-righteous jerk.

  3. Protesters in DC are a special breed of crazy. "Are you just like every other American?" Really? Were there no Americans at the protest, then? WTF?

    This reminds me of Palin complimenting the "pro-America" towns.

  4. Your life is crazy and very fun to read about :) Not sure how you do it :)

  5. i walked past a guy once who was just "mini-streaking" down the street. just letting it breathe i guess, while he was fully engaged in conversation with a friend like nothing was hanging out of his pants. c'mon man, everybody can feel that breeze.

  6. I envy you those weird experiences. Maybe someday I'll live in a city I can feel violated in.




Leave me some love.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...