Sunday, January 16, 2011

The Boots With ALL OF THE FUR

My best friend & her husband have a dog named Buster. Buster's a schnauzer, a cute little guy with an old man face & a permanent beard. See? Meet Buster:


Yesterday night, I was reminded of Buster in the worst way possible - when I saw a woman wearing a pair of boots that appeared to be made out of him. She was pretty; she seemed otherwise sane, dressed in leggings-as-pants (I won't even get into that) & a weird-but-still-bizarrely-trendy menswear vest. But THE BOOTS. My God, I couldn't tear my eyes away from the boots. It was like she skinned two Busters & put one on each foot.

I tried to stealthily follow her to grab a photo, but I wasn't tricky enough, not like I was with the Wolf Lady. I was really disappointed that I missed an opportunity to show you these monstrosities - & then I woke up to this tweet from Arielle:


It's a pride parade version of the Buster boots! What is wrong with everyone? Dogs are not for wearing. But I guess this chick at Target didn't get the memo, either, because she's wearing a crimped miniature poodle version:


I'm firmly not of the Petco-on-my-feet genre of fashion. To give you a feel for the sort of boots I'm into, here are the three pairs I currently own, none of them involving the use of dogs as snow apparel:

Though I've been known to criticize other people's boot choices (sorry, Alana), I am usually of the "To each her own" state of mind. But I have to draw the line somewhere, ladies. There are so many boot options that don't involve wearing stuffed animals on your feet - in other words, so many boot options that I will not make fun of. Go crazy on Zappos. Better yet, save your money & enter to win a pair of Whooga Uggs, if Uggs are your thing, or if warmth is (PS: discount code 1343SWEET for 10% off for the next week). And I will even admit to secretly liking these boots, which I realize look a little bit like Pocahontas & a cowgirl teamed up to design footwear while smoking crack out of a peace pipe:


That's right, I wouldn't make fun of these. Too much. But the puppies? Are for the petting. Not for the wearing.

Hungry Like This Woman's Jacket


The front of this masterpiece featured two fleece wolves howling at one another. From atop her breasts.

Oh, Midwest, you continue to surprise & delight me.
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