Saturday, May 7, 2011

The Long & Winding Road

I try to keep this blog relatively free of adult themes, because I believe humor is for everyone, not just sailors & sinners. But when my iPhone mapped directions to WalMart yesterday, I couldn't resist sharing with you the path it instructed me to take. I can't help thinking that there's a pervy Google cartographer out there who doesn't care that I just paid $4.12 a gallon to fill my tank or that the street he's leading me down is the darkest, creepiest, least-well-lit bit of road since that time I stupidly tried to take a shortcut through a graveyard at night. This guy's goal seems to be to get me to take the most phallic route possible, efficiency be damned.

It's sort of like a real-life Disney movie, where you have to keep an eye out to spot the inappropriate add-in. I found it, I found it!

In Which I Pledge Temporary Allegiance to the Boston Area

Where am I looking? I have no idea. But I SURE AM EXCITED ABOUT IT. This shirt was purchased in the little boys' section of WalMart for $7, & yes, I do indeed recognize the irony of the Red Sox sucking & the Indians not sucking the moment I switch cities. It's OK, I don't really know anything about sports, anyway. I do, however, like sports paraphernalia & fitting in & seeming more hardcore than I am. Was that supposed to be a secret? Probably.

Also, in case you're wondering what the rest of my really awesome outfit looks like, I present you with this:

Yeah, it's a pretty rockin' Friday night.
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