Thursday, June 9, 2011

In Case You Were Thinking of Stealing My Car...

Greeting from Starbucks, which is currently serving as a safe haven for me & about 20 others in hiding from a severe (& severely rainy) thunderstorm.

I'm lucky this weather didn't happen yesterday around this time, when I picked up carryout Thai from a nearby restaurant. After making conversation with the owners about how pleased I was to find good Thai food outside of D.C., I returned to my car with my chicken kaprow... & discovered I had locked myself out. My keys sat on the passenger seat, taunting me.

Thank goodness for that AAA membership my grandmother gave me as a Chanukah gift. "Someone will be out within 45 minutes," the woman on the phone told me. Tail between my legs, I slunk back into the restaurant, explained what had happened, & asked if I could eat my to-go meal at a table. I dumped my food out of the carryout containers & into real dishes, my first solo meal in a restaurant that doesn't have wifi. What an undignified entry into the world of eating alone.

When the locksmith finally came, he was... well, not a locksmith. He yelled "Are you kidding me?" at least 10 times - I counted. He also griped that my car, a late model Honda Civic, is the most difficult car to break into - as though it were a bad thing. I suppose that, under the circumstances, it was a bad thing, but that's certainly not a problem I typically mind having.

As he attempted to break into my car, the restaurant's hippie hostess ran outside: "Next time, go down to the 7/11 & ask a bum to help you!" she advised me. "They're the best at that sort of thing!" And then she ran back inside. Hysterical advice, honestly, considering it was totally unsolicited & unexpected, & also because it seems totally unlikely that A) there are many car-jacking criminals lurking around the sleepy town of Kittery, Maine, and B) there will be a "next time" that I lock myself out of my car in that exact spot.

"ARE YOU KIDDING ME?" the AAA technician shouted again, this time more angrily than before. As if to indicate that it was, in fact, kidding, my Civic burst into loud alarm peals. I took what was left of my chicken kaprow & made my way home, my dignity only slightly damaged & my appreciation for AAA wholly renewed.
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