Monday, April 11, 2011

I Bought WHAT?

Something I do very rarely is clean out my wallet. I save receipts like technology doesn't exist, & then I never do a damn thing with them. Case in point is the receipt below, which I recently discovered lurking in the dusty corners of my wallet:

Wait, let's take a closer look. SAY WHAT?

Things I could've purchased that would've shown up on a receipt with this heading include:
  • A disco ball
  • A KC & the Sunshine Band album
  • Some sort of '80s or Beyonce-themed workout tape
Do you know which of these things I bought at the Hudson News in Penn Station? If you guessed "none of the above," you're correct. Unfortunately, I can come up with no thoughts on what I actually purchased.

But that's not all! Let's take an even closer look:

Yeah, now I'm really confused. Based on this, it seems I purchased a few old women - and what a deal I got on them! How I managed to fit them in my small, roll-on suitcase, I cannot say. But elderly ladies are usually small & hunched, right? So I bet it wasn't too tough for them. The only question is, where are they now?! I seem to have misplaced my four elderly ladies....

And just for good measure, a bonus buy:

It seems I was imbibing, too! Maybe that's why I can't remember what I bought...

30 comments:

Good Girl Gone Blog said...

Lol this is ridiculous!

April said...

LOL do you know what those things really are??

Suburban Sweetheart said...

I seriously have NO IDEA:

steph anne said...

Hahaha! I've never came across anything like this before on my receipts. Now you really got me wondering what you really purchased! ;)

theTsaritsa said...

Maybe you bought some funny greeting cards? That's my guess!

Suburban Sweetheart said...

I wish I knew, too!

Tara said...

Hahaha, this is possibly the best receipt ever, you should keep it and frame it. then, maybe one day, it will all come back to you, and will no longer be a mystery.

I have a habit of keeping every receipt I get for some unknown reason, too.

Regina said...

haaaaaaaahaha, Oh New York....

susan said...

Hahahah. How they decide to name things in a system is hilarious. Someone was having a happy day when they did that!

Dena said...

I returned my then-8-year-old kid's library books about a year ago and noticed on the return ticket:
1. Junie B. Jones (perfectly acceptable for her age group)
2. How to Make Love Like a Porn Star by Jenna Jameson

I'm pretty sure my kid DID NOT borrow #2. And they had the nerve to try to charge me a late fee. HA! I already rail like a porn star - I don't need instructions!

Jaclyn said...

This is great. I'm even googling them, too, trying to figure out what the crap that means.

Jaclyn said...

OK, I might have typed in the number corresponding to "Shake your booty." Google suggested I try the UPC Database. I might have created an account. That UPC number isn't in there, but similar ones are. They suggest to me that "Shake your booty" is a greeting card. What's the date on the receipt? Can you figure out which friend has a bday/anniversary/something near it? I bet Old Ladies on a Bus is a card, too. Didn't you once blog about wanting to send snail mail more???

OK, now that I've sufficiently creeped you out ...

Jaclyn said...

The UPC site thinks that shooter NYC thing is a snow globe.

Suburban Sweetheart said...

Ha! You're a genius! I bet I DID buy birthday cards there - it seems everyone I know has an April birthday. And I bought Nathan a snowglobe, too, a quick souvenir before I headed home. Mystery solved!

Jaclyn said...

((bows)) I'm glad my I WILL FIGURE THIS OUT'ness didn't creep you out.

Stephany said...

LOL. I love how Jaclyn looked it up! It really satisfies my curiosity. :)

theTsaritsa said...

Why do my comments keep disappearing from your blog?! I left you a comment yesterday and suggested they were greeting cards!

CAPow! said...

Where do you keep your 4 elderly ladies on a benc? ;)

kim said...

awesome! happens to me all the time. unfortunately. otherwise i might actually have savings *sigh*

LBB said...

What a crazy receipt nomenclature! What gives?

I'll take two of those four old ladies off your hands for 2 bucks.

Linkaliving said...

I love this post! I feel you on the crazy wallet. I just cleaned mine out yesterday and it was not pretty.

Laura said...

This is hysterical. I'm surprised that shopping trip wasn't more memorable!

Nora_L said...

HA. This made me laugh right out loud.

skinny_dip said...

The first thing I did when I went to Penn station for the first time was bought stuff at the Hudson News. I don't remember what I bought but, I wish I still had my receipt...maybe I bought something like "old men rollerblading" or (hopefully) some "shake your booty" because that sounds awesome.

emmysuh said...

Hahaha, that is awesome!

I used to do the same thing, collect receipts but never balance. THAT'S WHAT ONLINE BANKING IS FOR.

B. said...

When I first opened this post, my eyes went straight for the "4 elderly ladies" and I thought...what?! They're on sale this time of year?! <-- Just kidding. Hahaha!

Seriously though, you should definitely frame this receipt. It's hilarious!

tiffany said...

Oh god. I thought I was the only person who kept receipts for no real reason. This is a weird (but totally funny) one. haha

Chaviva G. said...

Holy Moses ... this is hilarious. I once found a receipt from Target that showed the purchase of "Four Bermuda Shorts" and I was like, WTH!? I went into the store and ripped the Target employee a new one for charging me for something I would *never* buy (I haven't worn shorts since 10th grade), and that I would never buy for my husband (He buys his own shorts, what do I know?). They even checked the security camera and said I purchased it. I stormed out yelling "I'll never shop here again!" And then? As I walked to the car ... I realized it was bike shorts I'd purchased ... because I wear them under my skirts in the summer. Wow. I'm a douche.

terra said...

Those poor old ladies. I bet they're wandering around somewhere, all itty bitty, like those little blind mice from the Shrek movies. They're probably scared and hungry, wherever they are.

simplyvonne said...

lol shake your booty one is way too funny!!!
:D

xoxo
yvonne from www.simplyvonne.blogspot.com

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