"Foolish?" I can hear you thinking. "That sounds brilliant! And lovely!" And in most cases, dear blogosphere friends, you'd be correct. But you - or most of you, at least - do not work in my office (hi, coworkers!) or, more importantly, have my luck.
My day went as follows:
- 10:00 a.m.: Text from coworker/close friend informs me that our boss plans on being arrested for a peaceful protest outside the Sudanese embassy this afternoon. A good reason to be called into work, for sure, but try telling me that upon waking.
- Much back & forth ensues regarding whether I actually need to come in on my day off, regardless of my boss' decision to get arrested. Thankfully, the ultimate decision is "no," but that doesn't mean I quit checking my email. Thanks, iPhone. What I wanted most out of life was to be perpetually connected.
- I show up an hour & a half early for a 2:00 physical therapy appointment that I thought was at 1:00. I kill time by walking five blocks to Robek's for a pumpkin smoothie; I return to PT soaked in sweat from 90-degree weather. Dear denim: My swamp-ass & I hate you.
- I try to hitch a quick redline train to Chinatown for a solo viewing of "17 Again," which is not embarrassing at all. At Metro Center, the door on my train car refuses to close, thus prompting the conductor to unload the entire train. We wait at least 10 minutes before the omnicient voice of the Metro gods instructs all displaced Glenmont-waiting folks to head to the Shady Grove side of the tracks to catch out train. As soon as we do, a train arrives on the Glenmont side, prompting a stranger-supported rebellion (consisting only of mutual bitchery) in protest of the Metro Center WMATA employees' trickery tactics; we suspect we were sheparded to the other side of the tracks so we wouldn't bum-rush the first train to arrive following the breakdown. Bastards. They win; we catch the next train out. Total time from Farragut North to Chinatown: 36 minutes.
- I arrive at the movie theatre at 3:19 for a show that began at 2:45. Realizing the futility of my initial plan, I instead purchase a ticket to "Obsessed," having missed a mere six minutes. I proceed to check my email throughout the entire film. When I'm not working, I'm suffering through watching Ali Larter sexually assault & mentally abuse Beyonce's character's very fine husband. In other words, I'm suffering either way.
- Later, I am the first person to arrive at Lauriol Plaza for dinner with my BFFs, a restaurant that will only seat full parties. As everyone in my party indicates via text that they've yet to leave their respective offices, I stand alone in a Lauriol corner for approximately 20 minutes awaiting their arrival in uncomfortable sandals. Welcome, summer.
- Bonus points: During dinner, my mom calls to report a gas leak at our Ohio home.
In other words, thank God for small favors & large pitchers.